I had hoped to keep this quiet until I was basking in the sun on the Potomac river, but circumstances of a humorousinthepast nature have presented themselves to merit a series of posts. As indicated in my IntraCoastal Waterway post, my primary client these days is in the maritime industry. I have applied for a grant to perform some analysis on behalf of this client that would be well accommodated by having a small watercraft… so I used this confluence of circumstances to fall into the midlifecrisis trap: buying a boat.
In January I found a deal on a 21’ Mako – center console with a 200hp motor that was owned by a nice guy in Muhrland who was looking to move up to a bigger boat. The boat was only $5k (negotiated $500 off), a great price for a running boat, but I knew from the ad that the boat might have challenges (foreshadowing) when the hull is older than Christina Alguilera and the motor is old enough to buy beer. The deal was good, the seller was pleasant, but the weather was not – a series of snow storms prevented me from picking up the boat in Februrary. I waited until March, bought the appropriate tow adaptor for the Beast, and dragged the boat about 80 miles back to HQ in Reston.
The Launch
I waited until a gorgeous spring day during the week to tow the boat back around the beltway to Bellehaven Marina in Alexandria (about 25miles). I paid the dock master $5 (it is an NPS site managed by a private firm – Read: government fixed pricing) to launch the boat. THEN THE FUN BEGINS!
To launch a boat from a trailer, one has to back the trailer down the ramp, loosen all the bindings on the boat (tie a rope to the boat or you’ll be sorry) and then ‘jerk’ the boat off the trailer. This boat had been sitting on the trailer for at least six months, and the trailer has old wheels (one of which missing, but a replacement part of the purchase) so I had to give the boat a hell of a jerk to get the boat to roll off the trailer into the water. In doing so, the hitch came detached so the boat released, and so did the trailer. If not for the safety chains, I would have a trailer at the bottom of the Potomac also. The trailer did pop up and dent the hell out of the back of my truck . The cursing begins.
Once in the water, the engine would not tilt down to put the propeller in the water. It was stuck in the up position and the motor wouldn't engage to lower it. After a brief profanity tirade, I called around and even used a hammer for a while. Eventually a mechanic was walking by and he found a bad connection in the relay. The motor was lowered.
Then I kept the mechanic (via Jackson twins) and we tried to get the motor started - but the boat wasn't having it. He started talking about carburetor rebuilds and then wandered off. I spent another half hour trying to get it started, but at this point I noticed that the large mechanic (with a LOT of asscrack displayed) and me at the back of the boat working on the motor had caused the boat to start filling up with water. Looking through the hatch, I could see the bilge pump (that should evacuate water from the hull) doing its best Good Humor (just chillin). Before I really had a boat at the bottom of the river, I decided to cut my losses and pulled the boat back to the ramp, put the beast back in, and managed to use the manual winch to get the incredibly heavy boat onto the trailer. Since there was a missing wheel on the trailer, and the weight, part of the trailer left an incredible scratch on the hull as I pulled the boat back onto the trailer.
I had to get to a meeting across the river, so I left the boat, on the trailer, at the marina and hoped I would not get a ticket. When I returned three hours later, there was no ticket, but the adaptor for the trailer lights had been swiped by a walker-by.
Incredibly deflated, pissed off, and frustrated, I pulled the hull plug and drained at least two hundred gallons of the Potomac around the beltway on my way home.
I averted my eyes every time I walked out of my house for two weeks before coming up with the list of things that needed to be repaired on the boat before risking part deux of this adventure:
a) Repair wheel on trailer – to avoid damage to hull during transport and launch;
b) Repair any damage to the hull;
c) Repair / Replace relays in tilt motor so it is more than a barge;
d) Repair / Replace bilge pump to avoid large water storage device / sinking;
e) Not to mention get lines and prepare them to appropriate lengths – the plan is to get a slip at National Harbor so I don’t have to launch the boat. I’d rather have the boat waiting in the water for humiliating moments.
Pic: So much optmism. (pay no attention to the damage to the lawn) - other pictures unavailable (thankfully)
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